55. Does Being Happy Actually Make You Unhappy?

I recently got back from South America.

I know, I should have said.

Though fear not, I’m well aware that I’ve already bled that content dry, so this blog post isn’t some sort of review or reflection of my time there.

It’s more about a couple of things that I’ve noticed since coming back.

When I came back, I actually, much to my surprise, found myself in a strangely good mood for the first couple of days. 

And not just because of the world class Nando’s I had upon arriving back in the UK.

No, on top of those lovely post-holiday rested, recovered & refreshed feels, I felt a new sense of perspective “I know what’s important now, I’ll never be stressed again!!!”

Good stuff all round. 

However.

However, I noticed a direct correlation between this refreshed, carefree and dare I say content version of myself, and a complete lack of motivation or desire to get back to regular life. 

Happiness high, drive low. 

And how did this particular dichotomy manifest itself?

Motivation to get out of bed, meh.

Motivation to work, meh.

Motivation to go to the gym, meh.

Motivation to go to Jiu-Jistu, meh.

Motivation to write, meh.

Motivation to do anything other than watch ‘The Rest is Football’ on Youtube, meh.

From this, it’s probably not too hard to then predict how I was feeling a few days later. 

Rutty.

Almost paradoxically, the contentment seemed to be the direct cause of the subsequent discontentment.

I’ve seen this sort of pattern or cycle before. It goes something like:

1. Feel consistently down

2. As such, feel the need to do something about it (e.g. healthier diet, exercise, general habits etc.)

3. As a consequence of this, start to feel better

4. However, as ‘e.g. healthier diet, exercise, general habits etc.’ is difficult to sustain, we bin these off once we feel better

5. Now we’ve stopped doing the stuff that got us out the rut, we can start to slip back into one...

And the cycle repeats. 

I think we see this ‘Good thing can breed complacency, and complacency can turn good thing bad’ Cycle across a whole host of areas of life. Work, relationships, fitness and so on.

In his (very enjoyable & easy to read) book ‘Same As Ever’, Investor Morgan Housel describes the Economic Cycle following a similar pattern:

1. When an economy is stable, people get optimistic

2. When people get optimistic, they go into debt

3. When they go into debt, the economy becomes unstable 

This is pretty much the exact same principle as from G. Michael Hopf’s book ‘Those Who Remain’, who states:

1. Hard times create strong people

2. Strong people create good times

3. Good times create weak people

4. Weak people create hard times

And goodness me, how that “Good times create weak people” section is currently resonating…

I’m hoping this post doesn’t come across as a plea for pity (although always happy to accept some 🙂). Instead, as Instagram only sees the holiday and not the subsequent come down, it’s intended to be more of a transparent reflection on some of the more challenging post-holiday times that I’m sure a lot of us have to deal with. 

And if the above Cycles do have any truth to them, then I suppose it’s quite clear what can be done about it…

Though before I do set my alarm for 6am tomorrow and try and get back to it, I’m sure one final toast to South America wouldn’t hurt anyone 🙂...